I am getting my garden done in the next couple of months, and as my garden is quite big, it is going to cost a small fortune!
The garden needs this done:
- shed cleared[not a lot in it], underneath cleared out, painted inside and out/flooring put in
- run cleared and scrubbed/wood and metal painted/lock fixed[possibility of needing a new fence on one side built which would need painted]
- big area of scrub cleared, dug, covered with polythene, covered with gravel/big boulders put in
- edges cleared and covered with gravel
- raised planters put along all edges
- fences painted
- small scrub area completely cleared and dug over and smoothed down/ chicken coop and short fence/run added
- walls washed down and painted- one lower half of the house[only on the side wall], and one big tall back wall[it is just the pebble dashed area is that is needing done, not including where there is ivy]
- gate sanded back down and repainted, new lock put on it,screening material added to provide privacy/extra security for the dogs
- rest of area power-washed and cleared
- rabbit hutch placed with run/ very small shed built/ table and chairs[picnic table] built/ tool box built/small shelf style greenhouse built[I would also like the wooden stuff painted]
- window sills on whole house painted
- the fence at the front[very small metal one] sanded and painted
- remove bush from very small front area and place tall planters
- sand and repaint hanging basket hooks and new hanging baskets added
- a swing or rocking item for DS to be placed
I'm going for the Japanese Rock Garden look
I cannot wait! I will be getting a few rescued battery hens for eggs, a rabbit and a guinea pig once it is done. I will show you guys pictures when it is all done of the before and after difference.
Anyway, I spoke to DS's psychiatrist yesterday and she suggested him not going to school, and me monitoring his behaviour. So he went to bed yesterday with zero drama, woke up with zero drama, got dressed with zero drama, went to the post office where there was a huge queue[usually a trigger] with zero drama, went to a shop with zero drama, went off with T for a day at the allotment with baby N with....guess what; zero drama. And even when I called T's phone after the therapy session, DS answered and spoke to me with zero drama... really; the justifiable response is I am thinking that it is the SCHOOL which is creating the drama! ESPECIALLY since all the trouble began the day DS began nursery school. And that in other situations; at AFC[childcare], M and P's, out with B1 or B2, or their wives, or with me when I have things set up for his difficulties there is very few meltdowns!
Ahhhhhhh therapy.... scary biscuits. It was explained to me that my brain is like a circle with a line through it, on one side is my memories that I am conscious and aware of. The line in the middle is like a policeman who keeps all the memories in the other side, subconscious/unaware... and by talking to her we are making the policeman guard less of the circle and allowing more memories come to the surface. HEY! That's two analogies involving policemen in less than a week! I'm going to give any policemen reading this a complex! Also it is a combination of conscious and subconscious that guides my actions- so it's something in my subconscious triggering my panic attacks when it seems there is no reason to be scared, and by talking we can find out why I panic and how to defeat it! What a LOVELY positive thought, even though I'm slightly sceptical about that one...
We discussed anger, confusion and emotions coming to the surface. Also my being careful I don't get influenced too much by people I know- but you know, I've been an island unto myself for so long that that is pretty much par for the course.
I explained how difficult it is for me to be open and emotional as I was raised to always have a happy face, never have a bad day, never speak of a negative event after it happens, never share anything with anyone. As I already know; I have a high IQ, and a terrible EI.
Here are my results of that quiz:
Your results indicate a low score on emotional intelligence.
What Does Your Score Mean?
People with a low score on emotional intelligence may have a difficult time interpreting, understanding, and acting on emotions. They often have difficulty expressing their own emotions and feel uncomfortable around the emotional displays of other people. In some cases, those who score low may experience low self-esteem, poor self-confidence, and may have difficulty feeling empathy and showing love for others.
What Does Your Score Mean?
People with a low score on emotional intelligence may have a difficult time interpreting, understanding, and acting on emotions. They often have difficulty expressing their own emotions and feel uncomfortable around the emotional displays of other people. In some cases, those who score low may experience low self-esteem, poor self-confidence, and may have difficulty feeling empathy and showing love for others.
I disagree with empathy as an issue- I feel emotion so strongly I often suspect that I am entirely made OF empathy! And the showing love one is confusing; because with DS, it is EASY to show him love. I say it to him frequently throughout the day, every time we seperate for childcare, a visit to M and P's, going to school etc as well as first thing in the morning, and last thing at night. However; for everyone else, it is true. I both crave and am terrified of hugs, saying I love[or even like] you, or any 'mushy stuff'. I become INCREDIBLY uncomfortable the second people express positive emotion for each other. Even in films and even though M and P were always loving to one another growing up. Hopefully the therapy will help me get better EI.
The HV was just here and I updated her on all the up-datable stuff- she is helping me with a referral to the enuresis clinic for DS's bed-wetting issue and she is getting me some more rubber sheets! And I know it's rubber sheets but woohoo free stuff! I also asked her opinion on pests such as flies... no help there but damnit I can google!
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